Lately...

Lately, I have not been a nice person. I have actually avoided public places, social gatherings, or other events where I may have to be nice. It's really sad, but I just think my "niceness" has expired, or ruined. I don't know what to do to get it back. I am sure that this is no way for a person to co-exist in a world with other people.

This weekend I left town. There was a hurricane coming. It was going to be bad. There was a HUGE area of possible impact. I'm certain millions of dollars were spent evacuating people and pets from the most likely impact area. Well, hurricanes...lately, they are just another item on my grumpy list. Lately, I'm tired of doing the responsible thing. (Some people felt that it would be more responsible of me to cancel my plans and sit home and wait to prepare for a hurricane that would not really affect our area.)

Lately, I'm tired of doing things for other people. I have lost the desire to donate to charities, offer meals to the homeless, or simply go beyond the bare minimum of what is required of me.

Lately, it ticks me off at myself for acting in such a selfish way. I remember a couple of years ago, I had the same problem. A good friend of mine, a mentor in many ways, put it to me quite simply. He said quit doing things for people and expecting something in return. Lately, I've had a hard time remembering that.

Maybe it's a midlife crisis? Am I old enough for one of those?

Hopefully, I had a good enough time over the weekend that I can get over it - at least some of it! I had a great holiday weekend. I'm glad that the hurricane, lack of dog sitters and just sheer worry did not keep me home this weekend. Lately I worry way too much...